As the nation mourns the apparently voluntary departure of John Sergeant from Strictly Come Dancing because he says, he was worried he might win (how bizarre is that?), we've come up with a solution: Peter Mandelson, who has said he quite fancies a twirl for Bruce and the Judges
Send for Mandy: It seemed to have worked for Gordon Brown!
But our light-hearted idea appears to have taken a very odd twist: A conspiracy theory, no less, courtesy of UKip.
In an internal memo, they talk of "dark forces at work" - blaming Alastair Campbell (really) of forcing the BBC to create a vacancy on the show for Lord Mandelson who "has already proved to be nimble on his feet as he hot-footed it from Hartlepool then Brussels and waltzed into the House of Lords".
They say he also "skipped away" from answering any awkward questions about his relationship with a certain Russian billionaire and, they point out, "not by chance Mr Sergeant's dancing partner is from the former USSR"
It ain't much as conspiracy theories, even humorous ones, go - but we thought we'd share it with you anyway.
We thought it was pretty good as a humorous conspiracy story but then taste in jokes really is rather fickle, isn't it?